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Monday, November 11, 2013

Alabama Police Officers Gather To Talk Safety

Police officers from across the state of Alabama will congregate in Bessemer for two days of lectures on the topic of police safety. Some of the topics slated for lecture include:

Mass shootings: Waiting Until The Shooter Is Absolutely Dead, In Rigor Mortis, Before Entering The Scene

How To Access Tons Of Military Grade Weapons Even If Your Town Hasn't Seen A Felony Since The Hoover Administration

"I've Tasered The Bastard 9 Times And He's Still Breathing: Now What?"

"Roadside Body Cavity Checks: Not Only For Pretty Women"

and the ever popular

"Giving A Suspect The Business When There Might Be Cameras Around"