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Saturday, November 28, 2015

Things Get Ugly At "Mr.Ugly" Contest


Photo compliments Associated Press

Chaos erupted at Zimbabwe's Mr.Ugly Pageant following claims the this year's winner, Mison Sere, wasn't ugly enough to unseat the reigning title holder, William Masvinu.  The pageant, in it's 4th year judges contestants on such qualities as "Can scare animals out of the forest", " Not even his mother could love him", "The doctor slapped both his mother and him" erupted after supporters of Mr. Sere claimed that Masvinu was chosen only because of lack of dental care which gave many the impression of an old, rusted picket fence when he smiled. "I'm much uglier than him. Only when he opens his mouth is he ugly" pined Mr.Masvinu who not only complained about the loss of the pageant but also the $500 that goes to the winner. Sere responded " He's only jealous because I'm uglier than him".
Officials state that due to the events surrounding the Mr. Ugly pageant security will be increased at next week's Ms. Skank pageant,  honoring the skankiest woman alive in Zimbabwe. Last year's winner, Ms. Lovein told reporters "I'm not worried. I'm already ahead of last year's 18 recorded STD's with 24".